Friday Flash Fiction - Another Christmas Abroad

Another Christmas Abroad

Daisy could never have predicted how many Christmases she would be away from home when she booked her first flights to New Zealand on the old computer in her dad's study. The plan was to do some fruit picking, possibly work in a vineyard or two, a ski season in Queenstown and then home via Asia, taking in Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand and wherever else she still had the funds for. 

She had had her arguments lined up like soldiers ready for battle, but to her utter surprise her parents were all for it. Go, they said. Enjoy yourself. You're only young once. With a backpack big enough to hold a small person in, they waved her off at London Heathrow two days after her twenty-third birthday. 

***

Daisy sighed as she opened the small box of Christmas decorations she had accumulated over the years. Her mother had at least three times as much and still insisted on getting a real tree. Stu had bought them an artificial one, with the lights already woven into it, the first Christmas they spent together in their small Auckland house. Every year she pulled it out from under their double bed and decorated it, sipping mulled wine despite the outside temperature being around twenty degrees Celsius.

She had met Stu in Queenstown six weeks before she was due to leave. She had been working as a ski instructor when she fell and pulled something that caused an excruciating pain in her back. He was also working the slopes that winter, and was finishing his physiotherapy degree the following year. Daisy went back to Auckland with him and never left. 

***

This time of year she missed England the most. Cold days, long dark evenings, candles, roasted vegetables, mulled wine, hot chocolate, Christmas telly. But she had Stu, who she loved, and her little girl, Skylar. As long as they were here, this would be her home.  

©2013 Laura Besley

Flash Fiction Diary  

I wanted to write a piece on the theme of Christmas and as an expat living abroad (and not going home for Christmas this year...boo hoo), this is what I came up with. 

Keep Your Life, Family and Career Intact While Living Abroad by Cathy Tsang-Feign, PhD

About the Book

Title: Keep Your Life, Family and Career Intact While Living Abroad
Author: Cathy Tsang-Feign
Publication: Pomelo Publishers; 3 edition (19 Sep 2013)
Summary: The challenges of living in a foreign country don't begin and end with culture shock. If you're planning a move abroad, you need to prepare yourself for the unique pressures, anxieties and personal and family problems common to all expatriates, which are often difficult to anticipate and a challenge to overcome. 
This expanded new edition contains new information on expatriate relationships and marriage, third culture kids, and a thorough guide to finding help abroad. (amazon)

What I Think

The first paragraph of Dr. Cathy Tsang-Feign's Keep Your Life, Family and Career Intact While Living Abroad (third edition, revised and expanded) is as concise, true and informative as the rest of her book: 

"There is a lot of romance associated with living abroad. It is often seen as a life of glamour, of white suits and high tea on palm-shaded verandas, chauffeurs and servants and dinners with diplomats, with no problems in store other than a touch of culture shock." (Foreword) 

Culture Shock, Dr. Tsang-Feign says is "better defined as acculturation, [...] a process which can last from six months to more than a year." The process is broken up into four easy-to-understand steps: 

• Elation - "When first in a foreign country, one finds it quite stimulating that most things are so unlike back home." 
• Resistance - "Frequent comparisons between home and the host country make everything back home seem so much better." 
• Transformation - "Individuals feel more familiar with the environment and begin to see the good side of the host country."
• Integration - "Cultural barriers are bridged." 

Having lived abroad for many years, both as a child and as an adult, I found this theory to be completely accurate. In my experience I have found some countries easier to settle into than others, but the overall process is the same, just slower or faster. 

This book is extremely insightful; it explains theories, shows real life examples and offers helpful advice and tips. I certainly wish I'd read it twenty years ago! However, I know that I can dip back in it as and when I need to. The book covers and broad range of topics, such as: 'Problems of Moving', 'Third Culture Kids', 'Stress at Work and Home' and 'All Alone and Far From Home'. I cannot recommend this book more for people living, or thinking about, living abroad. 

About the Author

Dr. Cathy Tsang-Feign is a leading expert in the field of expatriate and cross-cultural psychology, based on decades of experience working with international executives and diplomats and their families in North America, Europe, Asia and Australia. 

She holds Master's Degrees in Counseling and Family Therapy and a PhD in Psychology. She has practised professionally in Los Angeles and Atlanta, as well as London's Harley Street, and currently runs a private practice in Hong Kong. She travels extensively to provide training and assessments for international corporations and government organizations. 

She is a former columnist on family psychology for the South China Morning Post and American in Britain. 

She is married with two children and is an avid gardener and beekeeper in her spare time. 

For more information, visit her website: www.cathyfeign.com

Friday Flash Fiction - week 23!

Silence is Golden

"George, this is just not what I’d expected when we moved out here." 

"You were the one who wanted to move here." 

"I know, I know, but I hate it." 

"And I love it!"

"Lord only knows why. It’s so boring!"

"It’s beautiful, and peaceful, and we don’t have to go to endless social gatherings with your so-called friends." 

"Oh, so now it’s about my friends as well, is it?"

"Well, honestly Barbara, you don’t even like half of your friends. I really don’t know why we had to keep up with them." 

"That’s just the way it is." 

"But why?" 

"It just is." 

"Well, we’re best off out of it is all I can say." 

"I miss them. I miss everyone. Even the boy at the paper shop. There are days go by here and you’re the only person I see." 

"And why’s that so bad?" 

"There’s only so much you can say to someone over dinner you’ve already spent the whole day with." 

"You see, you’ve never understood the value of silence." 

"What’s that supposed to mean?"

"You talk too much. You always have done. It’s no wonder you don’t like it out here." 

"That’s it Fred! We’re going back. In time I’ll forgive you for that remark." 

"No, Barbara. You’re going back. I’m staying here." 

L. Besley

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Flash Fiction diary

This piece was inspired by an email conversation I had with my buddy Nina Croft at Writers Abroad. She lives in a very remote part of Spain and sometimes it's hard for couples to adjust to the lifestyle, regardless of how romantic and idyllic it may have sounded. 

I've also stepped, rather gingerly, into the 21st century and have set up a twitter account! If you'd like to follow me, I can be found bumbling my way through this technology @laurabesley 
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Flash Fiction is short enough to read whilst you're waiting for the kettle to boil. It's fairly quick to write too, but with it being so short, every word has to count. 

On 4th May 2012 I decided to embark on a project: to write a piece of Flash Fiction every day. I'm hoping this will keep the creative juices flowing and ultimately help me hone my craft. Every Friday I'll be posting 'the best of the week' onto my blog for you to read. If you have anything to say (good or 'constructive'!), I'm open to comments.  

Thanks, as always, for reading.